Nicon Astaroth had only recently moved to the town before the incident occurred, taking up residence in the moderately haunted (and paradoxically named) Castle Where The Dead Things Live. Aside from the odd sacrificial fire, locals were largely unperturbed by their new neighbour, though some expressed concerns that members of a certain demographic had started to disappear ‘more frequently than usual.’

It became apparent that something was amiss when the usually purple-tinged sky transitioned to inferno red; the less observant became more so once the hellfire began to rain. Those still on the fence were convinced of their peril when the Chaos Well opened in the centre of town (a perilous downgrade to the wishing well that had stood there prior), at which point they were set upon by packs of barghest and endless swarms of Goes-In-Your-Ear imps. 

The subsequent array of horrors emerging along the feylines soon overwhelmed the Cradle. By the time the pit lords arrived, the townspeople not immolated, shredded or otherwise obliterated had been rounded up for their unearthly pleasures (‘Where’s Your Leg Gone?’ and ‘Chase Your Face’ being amongst some of the more popular means of torment). The notoriously troublesome archduke Egregious Graham later took up residence in the town hall, electing to wear the skin of the mayor despite being several sizes too large for anything to fit properly. Shifting him has proven immeasurably difficult in the past, a task that doesn’t get any easier as the cycles add to his already prodigious mass. 

Demon wranglers dispatched to the scene from Bharvale’s Department of Paranormal Remediation have yet to bring the situation under control, though several have found themselves under the control of a range of infernal machinations. Amongst the afflicted is celebrated devilocuter Ludwig Raubritter, who has spent the last several nights screaming into his pillow that he ‘doesn’t want the pencils.’ His incapacitation is likely to significantly delay the exorcision effort in the Cradle, given that the quickest way to remove a demon happens to be by getting them to think it was their idea. 

From the texts found in Astaroth’s chambers, it would appear that he had been trying to conjure a full Inglish breakfast in a bid to invoke sobriety, but in his intoxication confused the incantation for Devilled Eggs with the one below it; Devils, Endless. Arguably the real crime here is the one the folks in Ingland are committing against their fry-ups. 

Astaroth has been detained within Encara’s Burnt Eye Sanctum, a medium-security internment vault for magic users who prove themselves to be demonstrable idiots. He faces charges of negligent casting, using magic whilst under the influence, and incanting without a licence.