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Stores only brought them in on Halfnight, a huge pack of them as well, and already they’ve all gone missing and I KNOW they haven’t grown legs and wandered off because we had the cursebreakers in literally last week to put a stop to all that perambulatory nonsense (and we KNOW that is was you who was responsible for the contaminated batch, Wharley. Stop bringing in things that you’ve bought from your weird contacts, I don’t care if they’re a bargain).
I know for a fact it’s nobody in our office, I’ve already asked everybody and they know better than to lie to me, so if whoever it is could just come clean we can all get back to focusing on our jobs. I’d prefer not to resort to this but it’s getting silly now because Ken came in this evening and someone had been messing with his chair and Cleo’s stapler went missing which we bought them for their birthday last cycle and they really want it back.
Not to cast aspersions but Edwin overhead Findle from Security talking about how he’s really into eating foam ‘and in large quantities, I love it when it has a little scrubby bit on the top it makes my throat tingle’, which sounds incriminating if you ask me.
If anyone knows anything just email me, jane@vivaellipsis.com
Regards,
Jane (from Accounting)
• • •
Jane from Accounting shouldn't be using the public broadcast network for internal communications when there's a perfectly good email system for staff to use, though we do agree that it is a bit annoying about the scouring pads
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