This usually picturesque valley has found itself paralysed in the jaws of an all-consuming fear, with residents from Yharida, Uirm, Vangerdale, Underset and the Andira Garden Territories all claiming to be ‘just too afraid’ to leave their houses at night (which, given that it’s always night in Calandira, poses quite the inconvenience).
Although several locals have corroborated the stories of unspeakable horrors stalking the Fields, so far none have been able to give me any kind of useful description of what exactly it is they’re being haunted by (I suppose that’s what makes said horrors unspeakable).
One gentleman, a cobbler from the outskirts of Underset, told me through a bolted window:
‘My mate Terrance, right, he said it was a hoax yeah, and there was nothing to worry about because people were just getting themselves wound up over nothing, and that he wasn’t letting a bit of paranoia get in the way of him and his midnight stroll. Well guess who hasn’t been seen since last Ionight? Yeah, that’s right, Terrance. Sorry, but the man is a goner, and serves him right too, because I told him to stay inside and wait for this to pass, but he doesn’t listen to me ever, does he, the big idiot. Anyway, you oughta get yourself inside lady, because they’ll come for you like they did Terrance, whether you think it’s a hoax or not.’
Urgo Hengerswerth, Head of the Department for Regional Catastrophes in Calandira City, was aggressively dismissive of the issue:
‘Look, these people are always looking for reasons to not do any work. In Lyra it was an unconfirmed bout of the woolies, in Selena it was an overwhelming mulworp infestation (a species you won’t even find on Karabine II outside of a domestic setting, as I’m sure you’re aware), and if I recall correctly, in Harlow it was just “a generalised miasma of demotivation”. I’m telling you, the only thing haunting these folks is the all-consuming spirit of pathological malingery.’
I have my doubts as to whether ‘the spirit of pathological malingery’ can account for the alarming roster of missing persons in the region, but then again we all remember the Incongruity Fiasco of 62, so I’ll reserve my scepticism until we know for sure what exactly it is that is truly terrorising Calandira.